Try to remember some situation in the past when you were unhappy and yet you could not let go. That is emotional attachment.

This can easily pass itself off as love. But the truth is, if this condition causes suffering, sadness and anguish, it is certainly not healthy.

Emotional attachment is a kind of prison, and unfortunately, a very common reality. Need for control and expectation, disorganization of the energy flow, insecurity, and low self-esteem are some reflections of this evil.

The good news is that there is a way to overcome emotional attachment. In this text, I will talk more about the subject and help you get rid of what you are attached to. Come with me and I will explain.

What is emotional attachment and how it is established

In the light of psychology, attachment It is also understood as a search for approval and attention.

In the case of the subject of this article, the object of attachment will fulfill a specific emotional need of that person, who is in search of security and affection. The question is: how does this happen?

The process of emotional attachment can be established as early as infancy. Depending on the relationship with the mother - or caregiver - the attachment develops. It has to do with you having your daily needs met by another person.

As adults, we remain in this search for the completeness of needs and feelings, trying to adapt to the environment in which we live.

For example: at work, we usually approach people with whom we can also share information about our intimate and personal lives. In the same way in love relationships, with whom we create bonds by the level of affinity.

These are healthy and very natural ways of living relationships. It is a way for people to feel alive, because the bond is something vital for living together in society.

A natural and healthy relationship is premised on the independence of the parties, that is, when the separation occurs, everything is experienced and understood as something natural.

The problem is that this attachment is not always healthy, as I mentioned at the beginning. Sometimes it results in suffering - and therein lies the need for change.

The limitations imposed by emotional attachment

An emotional attachment can imprison you. Yes, that's right. This situation can limit your behavior at any level, hinder your personal growth, and even generate a dependent personality disorder.

One of the symptoms, for example, is the fear of some kind of abandonment or contempt. The ironic thing is that this is often an idea outside the reality in which the person is involved. This is because, in a way, they will not even miss what (or whom) they are emotionally attached to if they let go of that something or someone.

However, in this case, several feelings and emotions are out of balance within the individual, insecurity and low self-esteem being the main factors. Thus, the person wants to continue with the relationship because he believes it is what is necessary to keep his life balanced and happy.

This is a symptom of the need for control - which can create negative links and further delay detachment.

Emotional attachment can be activated from separation or the threat of separation, involving basic emotions of fear, anger, and sadness. And in order not to face these feelings, many people stay in failed relationships.

But the cost of this choice is high: diminishing yourself, losing your autonomy, giving up your will and your happiness. Is it worth it?

Difference between attachment and dependency

Initially, I can say that both are very similar. But emotional dependence is the result of attachment at a higher level.

Emotional attachment is a more internal and individual feeling. For example, the person really wants to be with someone, but does not interfere in any definitive way in the other person's life or routine.

Emotional dependence, on the other hand, is an invasive and excessive need to be cared for, established by infantile bonds, that is, the dependent person demands attention and care from the other, who, most of the time, has his or her life disrupted by this demand.

Someone who is very emotionally dependent, for example, can set rules that limit the other's freedom, just for fear of losing, of being abandoned. If the controlled person believes that this is love, he or she can continue living this story with suffering.

This emotional or behavioral condition disrupts the relationship of those involved, but also has repercussions in different areas of life.

Symptoms of Emotional Attachment

In a relationship, there are several signs that indicate attachment. If your well-being and emotional balance depend on another person, for example, you should know that the warning sign is already on:

• Submission behaviors to the other
• Signs of craving and withdrawal in the absence of the beloved object
• Difficulties in making decisions in relationships
• Feelings of dissatisfaction
• Emotional emptiness
• Fear of loneliness
• Low frustration tolerance
• Boredom
• Desire for self-destruction and negative feelings
• Lack of awareness about your problems
• Feeling of being stuck in the relationship and that you will not be able to leave it
• Identity Conflicts

In both attachment and dependency, there is the need to fill sentimental needs and open attachments, but instead of seeking self-sufficiency, the person will look to others for these references.

Of course, no relationship at this level will ever be satisfactory; on the contrary, it will always be dysfunctional.

8 tips for dealing with emotional attachment

There is no magic recipe to end emotional attachment from one hour to the next, because, as has been said, the problem may have been developing for years, often since childhood.

Therefore, understanding this scenario is extremely necessary to overcome the problem. And, with dedication and persistence, it is possible to break free.

To do so, your new relationships will be based on the tips I am going to give you here:

1. Recognize the problem: The first step is to recognize that emotional attachment exists, or that you are emotionally dependent on another person. Reflect on what each attachment offers, both in positive and negative ways.
2. Have more security: Regarding your actions and behavior, keep in mind that the future is uncertain and there is no way to control it, and a possible mistake is not your fault that can only be fixed by the action of others. Life is like that, uncertain.
3. Focus on you: Keep your actions and thoughts to yourself. Put yourself in the center and be aware of your knowledge and desires. It's not about being selfish, but being aware of what is really important for your life, your day to day life, your dreams. In time, you will notice that emotional attachment will give way to you at the center of his life.
4. Know how to say no: This is an important factor in the search for emotional balance in your life. Remember that this comes with training and encouragement.
5. Leave the past in the past: Don't get attached to experiences and people who were part of your life months or years ago. Think that the new will not arrive and take over if the old is not gone. The past may serve as experience, but it will never dictate the direction of your life.
6. Always question: The person who is emotionally dependent on another cannot see beyond what he is told. And this is where the danger lies. It is necessary to question, to doubt.
7. Assume your emotional responsibilities: Your life is your responsibility, as are your emotions, so there is no point in passing on this responsibility and wanting to put it in someone else's hands.
8. Use integrative therapies: There are countless possibilities with integrative techniques. Together, they will work deeply at the root of the problem, releasing the flow of energy and promoting balance, well-being, and quality of life.

Therapy to deal with emotional attachment

Remember that emotional attachment is the child of excessive control and anxiety, it is resistance preventing the flow of energy in the body. And that is where the techniques of Integrative Therapies present themselves as excellent solutions, because they have great potential to release this flow and help overcome attachment, bringing self-knowledge and releasing energies.

Reiki, for example, promotes self-knowledge through relaxation, and will act greatly on emotional and mental issues. Pranic Healing, on the other hand, will cleanse the energy centers of attachment, control, and expectations, energizing the chakras with an understanding of the whole and cutting the links with objects and people.

Lastly, Acupuncture promotes energetic awareness and understanding of the flow dynamics.

In short, you can see that emotional detachment is within everyone's reach. You just have to recognize the problem and start healing it. It is not always easy, but when you know this kind of freedom, your happiness will be well on its way.